Intuition & Faith

Always Best to Go Within

Whenever I am feeling most lost or confused, I shut down & shut out every human around me. I internalize every thought, feeling, sight, & sound. It's similar to a meditation process, however I'm not sitting quietly still & it lasts a lot longer than any meditation I've ever known of. I leave my body on autopilot to go about the daily grind as I go within to plan out the best course of action. I learned to do this as a child & have continued to do so my entire life. The reason being that there is not a single other human influence on this planet who will have or give me the correct answer. Anytime I've strayed from this process & took all too freely given, tho well intended advice I've found myself in a worse predicament than before. Even if things seem to smooth a lil at first, that becomes the proverbial calm before the storm. A lot of people have gotten offended by my shutting them out, but it is what it is. My higher self knows the best path to take on our journey to fulfill my purpose here so she wins, it's as simple as that. One prime example of this took place almost 3 years ago, shortly after I deliberately made myself homeless in attempts to not aquire an eviction on my record, due to the whole 2020 psyop fiasco, which I'm still not fully recovered from 4 years later!!

I was renting a room from my lil cousin, in a pretty destitute area of a completely impoverished city, which ironically is the capital city of 1 of the richest states in our nation. I was working for a company which definitely worships the whole slaves & master culture, and as an employee U are expected to be a good lil slave, something I'm not particularly good at. My lil cousins daughter had a ton of attitude & constantly trying to create a problem between her mother & I. I reached my breaking point, due to having absolutely no reprieve from the bullshit & chaos. No escape at work or home. On Saturday, April 10th 2021, I called out of work & began cleaning & packing. I had no clue where I would go but I knew it was time, I had to leave. When I finished packing, I was about to take the 2 trash bags out to the cans in the back of the building, when a voice inside told me, “Stop- text Mari, so her kid doesn't lock U out!!” I sat down took my phone outta my pocket & started the message to my lil cousin to inform her I was leaving & to thank her for renting me the room for the past 3 months. No sooner than getting started into typing my message, I hear outside the building pop, pop-pop, pop. Gunshots rang out. I calmly slid my chair forward away from the open window I had my back to & continued my message. Then I hear my lil cousins daughter & her wife, run outside (along with all the rest of the deedadees from the entire neighborhood- if U grew up in a warzone or in the heart of the ghetto, two things U learn are; 1 gunshots are normal life, 2 NEVER RUN TOWARDS THEM!!) & as soon as they were out on the back porch one of the girls started screaming. Apparently a 16yo neighborhood kid just got pumped full of lead in the backyard of the building. As morbid as it may sound, this news while disturbing, for me is just another day. By the time the EMTs arrived the kid bled out & died in the dirt of that buildings lil backyard right next to the trash cans. (When your Intuition speaks PAY ATTENTION!!) Once the street was cleared of first responders vehicles, I continued my initial task, took the trash out & ordered my Lyft. My SUV arrived about an hour later & I packed my belongings in, taking the 30 minute trip to one of my son's homes. When I arrived, I unloaded everything & asked my son if I could stay with him a couple of days to a week at most. His response was, “Ma I don't have the mental bandwidth for that right now, but U can spend the night here.” I slept on my son's living room floor for the night & texted a friend of mine who I knew had been homeless in that same town before, to ask him “where's a safe spot to lay my head out here??” I woke up early the next day, rented a motel room online for the next 2 nights, and got ready for work, packing a few basics in a backpack to get me thru the next couple days. When I went to work, still had no clue what I was going to do or where I would ultimately end up. As we were locking up the store that night I got a text from the friend I had texted the night before, his first question was,”WHERE THE FUCK ARE U??” I texted him back that I was at work and couldn't talk yet, he responded telling me to call him ASAP. When I went outside to wait for my ride to the motel, I called him back, told him what was going on & then my ride arrived. He told me to call him right back as soon as I got into my room. So I checked in, got settled & called him back. My friend J, who I had pulled from the street years earlier when he was homeless now had the ability to return the favor & he was genuinely happy to be able to do so. J told me, “I got a 3 bedroom apartment & it's just me & my baby cousin, I need another roommate.” Two days later on Tuesday, April 13th 2021 I moved into my own bedroom in an apartment with 1 of my best friends & his baby cousin.

Your Intuition (your Higher self) will ALWAYS guide U properly, if U listen. If U choose to listen to Human advice (which is most often based in Ego: fear, greed, anger, instant gratification) over your internal voice, U will most certainly be lead in the wrong direction. At least 3 times in that 3 day period, I followed my Intuition & because of doing so I ended up exactly where I was supposed to be exactly when I was supposed to be there. My circumstances became exponentially better in just 3 days because I had Faith in my Intuition to guide me correctly. This has been consistent throughout my life & is the very reason I have No fear of the unknown. As well, I can confidently say, Spirit Always Got Me No Matter What!!

So when U are facing scary or screwed up situations & U don't have a clue how to fix things to get right, go within, tune out everyone/thing else, & Listen the answers are Always there.

Until next time, Peace, Love & Blessings to U All- and Follow Your Intuition🥰🥰💜💜☯️☯️🧿🧿